On New Years Eve, I was sitting at home and I was content. I was happy and I was fulfilled. My heart was so full at that simple sight. My life has changed so much in the past few years and here I was smiling at the sight of a messy bathroom full of toys on a night when everyone is out bringing in the new year.
The past few years, we have struggled, we have grieved, and our faith in everything has been tested. We lost loved ones. We struggled with health scares and surgery. We didn't sleep. This year was not easy but I feel more blessed than ever. I can tell you after we lost several people close to us in such a short time frame, I was constantly scared of what or who would be next. I had this anxiety inside that I could not let go. While it is much better now, there are times when I'm afraid to let my guard down because that is when it hits you the hardest. I took that sense of peace that I felt in that messy bathroom as a sign that everything will be okay and I was ready to let go.
Having said that, as we closed out, 2011, it was bittersweet.
We watched Brady grow from a baby to a little boy.