Before I was a mom.

Before I was a mom, I could finish a complete thought without having to go back and retype/repeat what I just did.

I went to the bathroom all by myself.

I slept, like ALL night.

I could go somewhere all by myself without having to track down someone to babysit.

I could go somewhere without having to pack 10 pounds of crap that babies need.

My Saturday nights were spent out with friends.

I didn't cry at sappy commercials that talk about your kids growing up.

My boobs were much perkier.

I didn't know the theme song to 'Go, Diego, Go!'

I had more money, more time and more energy.


Now, there are days when completing a logical thought takes a lot of work.

There is no privacy.  My toddler has to be in the same room with me at all times because he forgot that the umbilical cord was cut two years ago. I go to the bathroom and it's apparently a big party in there! Sometimes, my husband even is invited but not by me. A girl just wants to pee alone for Pete's sake!

Sleep? Ha. What is that?

 My drive to work is my alone time.

My Saturday nights are filled with trucks, spilt milk and I'm asleep before 10.

There are random moments in the day (usually at work when I'm trying to concentrate) when 'Dora' or "Diego's' theme song pops in my head.

I've gone throughout the entire day only to find I had spit-up or snot on my clothes.

My money is spent on daycare, clothes since a growth spurt happens every 30 seconds and coffee to keep myself going.

My time is spent changing diapers, removing boogies and chasing a toddler around the house in attempts to get him dressed in a timely manner. The latter explains why I have no energy. Oh and that sleep thing too!

My life before was a lot less complicated. It was a lot less stressful and care-free

Now there is more chaos, laundry, worry, messes and love.

I'm happy with this new life of exhaustion, sleepless nights and pee parties. It might be more work and I'll probably never sleep a sound night for the next 18 years but that is okay by me.

Well, ok, so most of it. I'd love more sleep!