37 weeks: From panic, to crazy town to excitement!

It' official. I'm huge. Not the best picture or the most flattering but at this point, I just don't care. I think I'm to the point where Maternity clothes are barely covering me and add in the 90+ heat we've been having and yep..... We even took Brady to  Grant's Farm on Monday, which I think I should win some sort of awesome mom status for since walking around 9 months pregnant in the heat was not my ideal way to spend the day but alas, my baby boy had a blast. It was worth sweating my tail and waddling through it!

A little sneak peak at the nursery. Almost there. I put up the pack n play, washed the covers to the swing, bouncy, etc and the car seats are going in this week. Seeing as we didn't have the car seats installed when Brady was born, we are in pretty good shape! 

I've had a few moments where I've set into panic mode. I'm just getting the point (uh, I think on my facebook feed alone in the past two week, SIX babies were born!) where I want to meet my son, know he is okay and to be honest, just have the birth part over with. I have been over-thinking, over-analyzing everything. I know it sounds crazy but I'm terrified in all of it, something will happen to me and I try to come back out of crazy town and pray that it all works out in the best way possible. I've had a few random contractions, tons of bh and have been feeling a bit crampy, none of which I had with Brady. I'm hoping it means my body wants to get this baby out the same way I want it out!

Brady has been so sweet lately and I can't believe I'm going to be blessed with another little boy in my life. He was giving me hugs and kisses one night and as he was giving me hug #211, he told me, "This just makes me so happy!" It is moments like these I want to put in my pocket and hold onto but make me so more excited for our family to grow. 

36 weeks: The Homestretch or something

Oh my.

Oh my.

36 weeks.

I'm to the point where I"m officially done with people asking me when this baby is due or that I'm about to pop, or just about anything this week. It's hot. I'm huge and I feel like my hips might break into 100 pieces. The back pain is so much fun too. I believe I said to a coworker yesterday that if I have to go through 3+ more weeks of this, I am no longer answering my phone. My voicemail is blinking at me while I type.

I'm joyous, am I not?

I am. I really am.

That is until I re-read the pamphlet my OB gave me on VBAC's with death rates, risks and all kinds of statistics that made me wanna keep this baby in forever. However, from the research in that paperwork, a c-section has a much higher rate of a lot and that is what scares the crap outta me.

Oh, can I count thee ways in how I wish I could wake up and baby be out and we can all go on our merry way??

Anyway, back to being really pregnant and uncomfortable. I did NOT feel this way with Brady and I still have a little less than two weeks till I'm even with Brady's pregnancy since he came at 38 weeks.

I dropped early last week or the week before so walking is fun especially with a full bladder or let's talk about traffic and a full bladder. Ok, let's not. Well, at my appointment this week she confirmed he is low and right on my bladder. Yep. Didn't need to be felt up to know that. I'm barely a cm dilated and a very soft 50% effaced.

There were 3 babies born last week and I was sure it was a sign of something. What? I'm not sure but seeing all the babies put me in panic mode for a few days and now I'm getting more and more ready to meet my son. I have two more projects to finish before the nursery is complete.

Oh, and we have a name. I'll post more details on that soon if you couldn't understand Brady's upside-down toddler speak. I ordered Big Brother and Little Brother shirts this week and I can't wait to get them. Now I have to get a small gift from the baby for him and we'll be ready to go! Oh, I guess I should pack my bag too, huh?

I think I've been in total denial of how close I am and how much this little man is going to rock our world but I really can't wait.

It's insane to me that we are soon to be a family of four. I've come super clingy to my little boy lately and leaving him everyday is getting hard. I want to savor ever moment we have together and this morning he asked me to lay with him a little bit longer. Even though I was already running way behind, I did.

Brady names the baby

If you listen closely, you might be able to found out what we are naming the baby. For the record, it is NOT Little Willie!

To all the momma's....

Happy Mother's Day to all the "Super Mom's' out there!

 I'm a day late but I was busy spending the day with the little boy who made me a mommy on my last Mother's Day before I become a mommy to another little boy!

I have to say it was pretty awesome to wake up to a big smile from Brady. He tosses me a shirt and says, "Happy Mother's Day! You Super Mommy!' What a great way to wake up! 

The day ended on an even better note. He not only told me he loved me 'more than trash trucks!' but then as we were getting ready for bed, he looked over at me and said, "I love you Super Mommy!' 

It' a big cape to fill but I think all mom's are 'mom enough' to be called, 'Super Mom,' so I hope you all enjoyed your day. 

On an unrelated note, today is 35/35. I can't believe we have less than 35 days till we will meet this little boy. I say less than because this momma still doesn't believe she will make it to her due date. 

To my firstborn

Dear Brady;

I can't help but find myself overcome with emotion as it gets closer to the day our family grows. I look at you and I find myself lost for words yet overcome with so many that I can't get them all out. I look at who you've become and who I have become because of you. I am so proud to be your mother and I find myself blessed beyond measure each time I hear you laugh.

You made us a family. You, my son, gave me the most priceless gift in itself. You made me a mother and for that, I can't thank you enough. You've given me the most amazing gift and shaped me to the person I was meant to be. You've given me strength when I wasn't sure I had it inside of me. You have given me the gift of unconditional love which bears unwavering beauty.

There are days when I look at you and I find myself riddled with guilt. I worry about how you'll handle the big changes to come but then I see you do something that amazes me and I know you'll be just fine.

That is the thing, buddy. You are so strong, so independent and confident in each step you take. You always know exactly what it is you want. You are so wise beyond your years and so very bright. You have this memory that amazes me, which you get from your daddy! The other day, you told me that you wanted to go pick pears in the backyard, which was something we did LAST summer. You have this hilarious sense of humor and the most contagious laugh which compliment those charming little dimples.

You are so endearing and loving in the most sincere way. You ask for kisses and tell me, "I love you!' all the time. You have this boundless energy that never ceases yet you can sit still in an activity for hours. You are made up of all the best parts of your daddy and I but also pieces of your own individuality that shines brightly. Your personality is bigger than many adults I know. I find it hard to pick one thing I love about you but that personality of yours tops my list.

I look at you and remember where we started. We were both learning and we have grown together in this journey of life. I remember bringing you home and immediately being filled with so much love and I never thought it could get better than this beautiful moment.

Then, each day, it did. I found myself more enamored and in love with each noise, each stretch and even each tiny little cry that grew into dimply laughs and chubby legs that run with boundless energy.

I remember the first time you smiled.

 Your first tooth.

Your first romp in the snow. 

The day you took your first steps.

The day you said, "mama'' for the first time and so many other magic moments that are forever stitched into the grain of my soul. I never thought such a tiny little presence could create such magical and monumental moments but you have done that every step of the way.

You have made every ordinary task, a new adventure. 

 You are the what I look forward to when I first wake up and I race home from work to be greeted by your big dimply smile!

So, my love, as we take this journey together, know that we are going together and I will always be there for you. I can't promise you it's going to be easy all the time but I know there will be precious moments of happiness and joy and countless instances of boundless laughter. I want you to always remember how much we love you, even though I tell you 101 times a day. The other day you told me, "Momma, you my best friend!' and I realized I was right. We have a bond that is solid as they come and you will always be my baby no matter no big you grow.

You and your little brother will do great things and you'll do them together.  That I am sure of! I see you as a leader in this life and you are destined for great things. I wish I could explain to you know how this new life will change yours and how you will both be the best of friends but what I can tell you now is that he is the luckiest little boy to have a big brother like you!  I know you are going to make an amazing big brother and I can't wait to take this new step in life with you by my side.

Moving on up!

I swear, my kid is getting too big. We've been talking about moving him to a big boy room for months since we planned on using the crib mattress  in the baby's room (with his old crib!)

So, after a very, uh, interesting evening with the in-laws who so graciously offered to get his big boy bed, we were on a mission to finish his room so that we could then focus on the newest addition!

Brady was very excited but unsure of what the heck we were doing to his well loved bed! I was a bit nervous about how he'd react to such a dramatic change but he did great!

Side note, my kid sleeps now. It's amazing. I have to say too as I knock on all the damn wood in the house that since having this new big boy bed, he goes to bed so much easier. Who knew?

 Brady picked out the bedding set. I gave him a few choices and he picked this one out from here. I'm pretty sure it has all of his favorite things that go--cars, trucks, cement mixer, police cars, you name it, it's on there! The pictures are from Home Goods. Love that place!

 His first night in his big boy bed. Made mommy a bit sad to see him all snuggled up like a big kid.

I have to admit. I wanted to crawl right in there with him and never let him go!

Lots of changes!

First things, first! My doctor called yesterday to tell me my test results came back normal! Relief feels good, so, so good!

Now, onto not so good stuff. We found out not too long ago that my husband was going to be without a job. It's been quite stressful and we are hoping he finds something soon (which he is at an interview as I type!) since the timing is just awful but we'll get through it. We've been here before but when you have a child, it's so much different.

In the meantime, we've managed to get a lot done around the house! Brady now has a big boy room that is 100% done! I'll be posting pictures very soon. This also means that the nursery is coming right along. I have to say, I am going to love it. With Brady's room, it never felt done or right but this one feels like it will be perfect! It's such a relief to have these things moving right along!

Brady did a great job moving from his toddler bed right up to a big boy bed! He picked out the sheets and comforter, which of course are complete with trucks, trains, planes and cars! He curls up and just looks so sweet in his bed and I can't believe how big he is getting.

In fact, he decided that he was so big that using a big fat curse word was appropriate. Yeah. I guess he was pretty ticked he missed the mail man. I have to give him credit because he's used it in the right context several times though I don' t think I can ever face the public eye if he says it again. We've had some serious talks about it and I'm hoping we are done with that! I had to expect that was coming though, either now or later!

He made up for it last night but telling me, "Momma, you my best friend!'' I mean, seriously? Does it get better than that?
I guess that also makes up for the yogurt raisins he shoved in the DVR.