First and foremost, welcome to my child mouth and into my life. I'm not welcoming you on good terms. In fact, right now you are my not even on the somewhat likable list. I'm sorry but you are my worst enemy.
I know, molars, that seems awfully rude and inconsiderate but I'm not sure you understand the upheaval you bring to my life.
You see, my child has never been the best sleeper but we were finally sleeping at night until you came back into my life. My sweet, happy baby has turned into a whiny, clingy and crabby baby who gets up at the butt crack O' dawn which makes for a crabby mom. I wish that whine came with cheese or at least a slight buzz but it doesn't. It's not that good kind of whine. If you can bring me that, we might be able to negotiate.
So, here is my request. Just come on it and get it over with fast and easy. Please end the torture. Think about all the good food you'll get to eat!
One tired and exhausted momma
p.s. I am not against monetary bribes. If the tooth fairy comes when you fall out, a tired mommy can and will donate to a better cause: sleep.